mkk.

hello, its 2011 3rd of July already and i'm finally posting again. (:

2011-07-03T07:36:00.000-07:00

hello, it has been a long time since i blogged.

so i will blog today for old time's sake and for because i've missed blogging. i remember i used to blog almost every single day in my sec 1 year. i had blogged to captivate as many memories as possible so that one day when i go to my blog, i can read all that had happened before and relive those good and bad times and remember it all.

so, its 2011 now. (: sigh 2011. the last time i blogged properly was about a year ago, before i started blogging poems and song lyrics on my blog and then eventually stopped blogging. so here i am on the 3rd of July blogging once more. it has been a very long time. i've missed you blogger.

haha random fact. 1st July was Canadian National Day, 2nd July was Ashley Tisdale's birthday and the 4th of July will be America's National Day. so anyway, a lot of things had happened since i stopped blogging. i had spent the second half of 2010 happily as a 2e8'10 girl and i'm proud to have "graduate" from 2e8. i confess i miss my ex-classmates but i'm enjoying myself where i'm at now, in 3e4'11 (:

3e4'11 has been really awesome so far. met really really great ppl. Yu Yan, Pei Yi, Angela, Teri, Soo Ji, Xue Qi, Celine etc. (: haha my "Soshi" members lol. its only half the year gone now but these ppl have already given me so much to remember.

Zuyyin, Me, Divya and Yau Ting at Sentosa in October'10

Divya, Zuyyin, Me and Zann jumping on the top of the merlion

Me and Maria all dressed up to watch a SYNO concert last year

Pei Yi, Fardi, Me, Teri, Angela supposedly doing chem proj but camwhoring instead

Clarissa and i at her house supposedly doing chi proj but camwhoring instead too

Teri, me, Soo Ji, Angela at Sentosa during June'11

Cheryl and i at Iluma

me and Daniel sitting on the steps of Tanah Merah Country Club

haha this is kinda like the run down of what i did during the period of time when i didn't blog. all these are very very good memories. so yea. and these are memories i want to remember for a lifetime so i thought i'll post on my blogger haha.

i shall stop blogging now as its quite late. maybe i'll come back and blog a few days later (: or maybe a month or a year. haha who knows. see ya blogger (:

would you like yourself, if you met yourself?

2011-05-24T08:43:00.001-07:00

would you like yourself, if you met yourself?

Answer here

Funeral Blues

2010-08-13T07:30:00.000-07:00

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.

Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead
Scribbling on the sky the message She is Dead.
Put crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves,
Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.

She was my North, my South, my East and West,
My working week and my Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;
I thought that love would last forever: I was wrong.

The stars are not wanted now; put out every one,
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun,
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the woods;
For nothing now can ever come to any good.

i'll always remember you. ):

2010-08-09T00:35:00.000-07:00

I always knew this day would come
We'd be standing one by one,
With our future in our hands
So many dreams, so many plans

I always knew after all these years
There'd be laughter, there'd be tears
But never thought that I'd walk away,
With so much join but so much pain
And it's so hard to say goodbye

But yesterday's gone, we gotta keep moving on
I'm so thankful for the moments, so glad I got to know you,
The times that we had, I'll keep like a photograph
And hold you in my heart forever...
I'll always remember you

Another chapter in the book, cant go back but you can look
And there we are on every page.

Memories I'll always save,
Up ahead on the open doors
Who knows what were heading towards?
I wish you love, I wish you luck
For you the world just opens up
But it's so hard to say goodbye

Yesterday's gone, we gotta keep moving on
I'm so thankful for the moments, so glad I got to know you
The times that we had, I'll keep like a photograph
And I'll hold you in my heart forever,
I'll always remember you.

Everyday that we had all the good, all the bad
I'll keep them here inside
All the times we shared every place, everywhere
You touched my life
Yeah one day we'll look back, we'll smile and we'll laugh
But right now we just cry
Cause it's so hard to say goodbye

Yesterday's gone, we gotta keep moving on
I'm so thankful for the moments, so glad I got to know you
The times that we had, I'll keep like a photograph
And hold you in my heart forever...

I'll always remember you
I'll always remember you
I'll always remember you

every rose has its thorn.

2010-07-19T05:22:00.000-07:00

We both lie silently still
in the dead of the night
Although we both lie close together
We feel miles apart inside

Was it something I said or something I did
Did my words not come out right
Though I tried not to hurt you
Yeah, I tried
But I guess that's why they say

Every rose has its thorn
Just like every night has its dawn
Just like every cowboy sings his sad, sad song
Every rose has its thorn
Yeah it does

I listen to our favorite song
playing on the radio
Hear the DJ say love's a game
of easy come and easy go
But I wonder does he know
Has he ever felt like this
And I know you'd be here right now
If I could have let you know somehow

Every rose has its thorn
Just like every night has its dawn
Just like every cowboy sings his sad, sad song
Every rose has its thorn

Though it's been a while now
I can still feel so much pain
Like a knife that cuts you the wound heals
But that scar, that scar remains

I know I could have saved our love that night
If I'd known what to say
Instead of makin' love
We both made our separate ways
And now I hear you found somebody new
And that I never meant that much to you
And to hear that tears me up inside
And to see you cuts me like a knife

Every rose has its thorn
Just like every night has its dawn
Just like every cowboy sings his sad, sad song
Every rose has its thorn
Yeah it does

te amo

2010-07-12T05:50:00.000-07:00

She says to me, I hear the pain in her voice
Then we danced underneath the candelabra she takes the lead
Thats when i saw it in her eyes its over

Then she said te amo then she put her hand around me waist
I told her no,
She cried te amo i told her i'm not gonna run away but let me go
My soul is crying, without asking why
I said te amo, wish somebody tell me what she said
Don't it mean I love you
Think it means I love you
Don't it mean I love you

Te amo, te amo, she's scared to breathe
I hold her hand, i got no choice, uuhh
Pulled me out on the beach, danced in the water, i start to leave
She's begging me and asking why it's over

Then she said te amo then she put her hand around me waist
I told her no,
She cried te amo i told her i'm not gonna run away, but let me go
My soul is crying, without asking why
I said te amo, wish somebody tell me what she said
Don't it mean I love you
Think it means I love you
Don't it mean I love you

Yes we can dance, but you gotta watch your hands
Watch me all night, i move under the light
Because i understand, that we all need love
And i'm not afraid to feel the love, but i don't feel that way

Then she said te amo then she put her hand around me waist
I told her no,
She cried te amo i told her i'm not gonna run away, but let me go
My soul is crying, without asking why
I said te amo, wish somebody tell me what she said
Don't it mean I love you
Think it means I love you
Don't it mean I love you
Think it mean I love you
I love you

Te amo, te amo
Don't it mean i love you

take me along

2010-07-03T06:19:00.000-07:00

The city of angles is lonely night
Keep themselves alive by candle light
Say she can't love you like I do
Look me in the eyes and say it's true
I ask myself, is this love at all?
When I need you most you let me fall
I'm always here at the side of your stage
Would you live your life and pretend I'm okay
I'll be okay anekatips
I'll hold you close will stay forever

I, I don't understand why your leaving me
I, I don't understand, now without you I can't breath
Please don't, don't leave me here
Take my hand and I'll plead into tears
I don't understand why you can't
Take me with you

You can pretend that I don't need this
She'll see my face every time you kiss
I hope you hurt when your walls fall down
When you hear the sound that I'm okay
I'll be okay
If you can hold me down I will you forever

I watched you leave for I'm awake tonight
And I'm ready to go for the last time
And through the tears I say goodbye
So breath in, breath in, breath in, breath out

though the eyes of love.

2010-06-30T00:50:00.000-07:00

Please, don't let this feeling end
It's everything I am,
Everything I wanna be;
I can see what's mine now
Finding out what's true,
Since I've found you
Lookin' through the eyes of love.
Now I can take the time,
I can see my life
As it comes up shining now;
Reachin' out to touch you,
I can feel so much,
Since I've found you
Lookin' through the eyes of love.
And now, I do believe,
That even in a storm,
we'll find some light;
Knowin' you're beside
me, I'm alright.

Please don't let this feelin end,
It might not come again;
And I want to remember
How it feels to touch you;
How I feel so much,
Since I've found you
Lookin' through the eyes of love...

you are the only one.

2010-06-07T22:35:00.000-07:00

Forever is a long time
I'm not gonna lie
Is that a promise you can make
Are we in the right place at the wrong time
Right now i really need some space

Together on the front line
Look me in the eye
Tell it straight to my face
Are we going to work it out
Or pack it in
I guess this is the chance we take

'Cause you are the only one
That gets me
Knows me
Feels me
Hurts me
And you are the only one
Who's close enough
To drive me crazy
Frustrate me
Complicate me
Make it harder than it needs to be
But the things that you do
And the things that you say
Make me want to stay

Everything is alright
Some of the time
Are we going through a phase
Are we moving too fast
Going too slow
Am i just afraid to make mistakes

I want to keep it real now
And don't make a sound
I want to see it in your eyes
Are we going to shake it up
Or knock it down
But deep inside
I know that we'll survive

'Cause you are the only one
That gets me
Knows me
Feels me
Hurts me
And you are the only one
Who's close enough
To drive me crazy
Frustrate me
Complicate me
Make it harder than it needs to be
But the things that you do
And the things that you say
Make me want to stay

Through the ups and downs
I do
Just want to be with you
With you..

over.

2010-05-08T21:42:00.000-07:00

I watched the walls around me crumble
But its not like I won't build them up again
So here's your last chance for redemption
So take it while it lasts because it will end
And my tears are turning into time I've wasted trying to find a reason for goodbye

I cant live without you
Can't breathe without you ,
I dream about you,
Honestly tell me that its over
Because if the world is spinning and I'm still living
It wont be right if were not in it together
Tell me that it's over

And I'll be the first to go
Don't want to be the last to know

I won't be the one to chase you
But at the same time you're the heart that I call home
I'm always stuck with these emotions
And the more I try to feel the less I'm whole
My tears are turning into time
I've wasted trying to find a reason for goodbye

Tell me that it's over
Over
Honestly tell me
Honestly tell me
Don't tell me that its over
Don't tell me that its over..

naturally.

2010-04-06T05:40:00.001-07:00

How you choose to express yourself
It's all your own and I can tell
It comes naturally, it comes naturally

You follow what you feel inside
It's intuitive, you don't have to try
It comes naturally, mmmm it comes naturally

And it takes my breath away
What you do, so naturally

You are the thunder and I am the lightning
And I love the way you know who you are
And to me it's exciting
When you know it's meant to be
Everything comes naturally, it comes naturally
When you're with me, baby

Everything comes naturally, it comes naturally

You have a way of moving me
A force of nature, your energy
It comes naturally (You know it does)
It comes naturally
Mmmm yeah

And it takes my breath away (Everytime)
What you do, so naturally

You are the thunder and I am the lightning
And I love the way you know who you are
And to me it's exciting
When you know it's meant to be
Everything comes naturally, it comes naturally
When you're with me, baby

Everything comes naturally, it comes naturally

When we collide, sparks fly
When you look in my eyes, it takes my breath away

You are the thunder and I am the lightning
And I love the way you know who you are
And to me it's exciting
When you know it's meant to be
Everything comes naturally, it comes naturally
When you're with me, baby.

vanilla twilight

2010-04-03T06:29:00.001-07:00

The stars lean down to kiss you,
And I lie awake I miss you,
Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere.
Cause I'll doze off safe and soundly,
But I'll miss your arms around me
I'll send a postcard to you dear,
Cause I wish you were here.

I watch the night turn light blue,
But it's not the same without you,
Because it takes two to whisper quietly,
The silence isn't so bad,
Till I look at my hands and feel sad,
Cause the spaces between my fingers
Are right where yours fit perfectly.

I'll find opposing new ways,
Though I haven't slept in two days,
Cause cold nostalgia chills me to the bone.
But drenched in Vanilla twilight,
I'll sit on the front porch all night,
Waist deep in thought because when I think of you.
I don't feel so alone.
I don't feel so alone.
I don't feel so alone.

As many times as I blink I'll think of you... tonight.
I'll think of you tonight.

When violet eyes get brighter,
And heavy wings grow lighter,
I'll taste the sky and feel alive again.
And I'll forget the world that I knew,
But I swear I won't forget you,
Oh if my voice could reach back through the past,
I'd whisper in your ear,
Oh damn how I wish you were here.

---------------------------------------

careful

2010-04-03T05:42:00.001-07:00

I Settle Down
A twisted up frown
Diguised as a smile, well

You would have never known

I had it all
But not when I wanted
'Cause hope for me was a place uncharted
And overgrown

You'd make your way in
I'd resist you, just like this
You can't tell me to feel
The truth never set me free
So I did it myself

You can't be too careful anymore
When all that is waiting for you
Won't come any closer
You've got to reach a little more

More
More
More,More

Open your eyes
Like I opened mine
It's only the real world
Life you will never know

Shifting your weight
To throw off the pain
Well you can ignore it
But only for so long

You look like I did
You resist me just like this

You can't tell me to heal
And it hurts remembering
How it felt to shut down

Can't be too careful anymore
When all that is waiting for you
Won't come any closer
You've got to reach a little more

More
More
More,more

The truth never set me free
The truth never set me free
The truth never set me free,
So I'll do it myself

You can't be too careful anymore
When all that is waiting for you
Won't come any closer
You've got to reach out

Can't be too careful anymore
When all that is waiting for you
Won't come any closer
You've got to reach out

More
More
More
More,more

i hope you find it.

2010-03-21T05:06:00.000-07:00

These clouds aren't going nowhere,
Rain keeps coming down,
I just though I'd try to call you,
For you got too far out of town
And I hope that you get this message,
That I'm leavin' for you.
Cus I hate that you left without,
Hearing the words that I need you to..

And I hope you find it,
What your looking for.
And I hope it's everything you'd
Dream your life would be so much more...
And I hope your happy.
Where ever you are...
I wanted you to know that ..
That nothing's gonna change that
And I hope you find it.

Am I supposed to hang around and wait forever
Last words that I said
But that was nothing but a,
Broken heart talkin baby
You know that wasn't what I meant
Call me up, let me know that you
Got this message Im leavin' for you
Cuz I hate that you left without
Hearing the words that I need you to

And I hope you find it,
What your looking for..
And I hope it's everything you'd,
Dream your life would be so much more..
And I hope your happy,
Where ever you are..
I wanted you to know that.
That nothin's gunna change that,
And I hope you find it.

Whatever it is out there that you were..
missin here.

make a wave

2010-03-16T21:04:00.000-07:00

they say the beat of a butterfly's wings can set off a storm a world away,
what if they're right and the smallest of things could power the strongest hurricane
what if you'd only hold the keys inside
you'd hold the key to turn the tide

just a pebble in the water
can set the sea in motion
a simple act of kindness
can stir the widest ocean
if we show a little love
heaven know what we could change
so throw a pebble in the water and make a wave
make a wave

the single joys that you take and send
you touch your hand with someone in need
don't pull yourself and say you can't
you never know what can grow
for just one scene
so come and seize the day
this world may never be the same.

nothing compares

2010-03-13T05:45:00.000-08:00

Walking down Brick Lane, feel the blue
Winds blowing lightly and I picture you
Sweet Sunday morning, with nothing to do
Love is like a dream, when it's just me and you.

Open my window, sing me a song
Baby can't you see that this is where I belong
With your hand in my hand, still feel feel the love
Really wish that we could go back to the way that it was

They say if it doesn't kill you it'll make you stronger
Oh, but I can't be without you any longer
Everytime I let it go, baby it's you
Nothing compares to you
Nothing compares to you

Sweet sunday morning, all by myself
Hard love what we've done, when with anyone else
Watch my mascara dripping down
Baby how did we end up like this? Where are you now?

They say if it doesn't kill you it'll make you stronger
Oh, but I can't be without you any longer
Everytime I let it go, baby it's you
Nothing compares to you
Nothing compares to you

I'm running fast, as fast as I can, to get you back, just to get you back again
I can not wait, I can not wait, if we can be, we can be us again
I cry at night, cry at night, I'll cry for all the words, all the words I didn't say
Sweet Sundays, sweet Sundays

They say if it doesn't kill you it'll make you stronger
Oh, but I can't be without you any longer
Everytime I let it go, baby it's you
Nothing compares to you
Nothing compares to you

Turn Right

2010-03-05T22:23:00.001-08:00

Pick up all your tears
Throw 'em in your backseat
Leave without a second glance
Somehow I'm to blame
For this never-ending racetrack you call life

So turn right into my arms
Turn right, you won't be alone
You might fall off this track sometimes
Hope to see you on the finish line

You're driving all your friends out
Get to a speed they cannot follow
And soon you will be on your own
And somehow I'm to blame
For this never-ending racetrack you call life

So turn right, turn right, into my arms
Turn right, turn right, you won't be alone
You might, you might, fall off this track sometimes
Hope to see you at the finish line

I did all I could, and I gave everything
But you had to go your way
And that road was not for me

So turn right into my arms
Turn right, you won't be alone
You might, you might, fall off this track sometimes
Hope to see you at the finish line

i believed...i seriously did believed you. stupid of me to do so.

2010-03-01T05:14:00.000-08:00

Tell me what's it gonna be this time,
Say that I was just fool to believe
You were mine
Cannot imagine life without you by my side,
And its killin my heart,
Cause I wish I knew why

Why would you do me this way,
When I love you
Baby

I believed what you said,
But love doesn't have a meaning
When you hurt me so bad
Just threw it all away
You knew I was scared
To once more that you give that close to me
Despite what you did
I believed

You said it was gonna be for real this time
You said you were gonna make it up to me
And everything will be fine
Never thought that I would have to let you go this way
Should've followed my heart
But I fell for the game

Life just will not be the same
Without you
Baby

I believed what you said,
But love doesn't have a meaning
When you hurt me so bad
Just threw it all away
You knew I was scared
To once more that you give that close to me
Despite what you did
I believed

Now what do I say
It was you
You that made the choice to walk away
But now
Love will come my way
Again
I don't wanna here your sorry
Cause you know we've reached the end

I believed what you said,
But love doesn't have a meaning
When you hurt me so bad
Just threw it all away
You knew I was scared
To once more that you give that close to me
Despite what you did
I really believed you..
So stupid of me to do so.

safe with me.

2010-02-28T04:52:00.000-08:00

I know I shouldn't keep anything from her,
But I'm hiding away because I love her.
I lock the door and throw away the key,
And the secret's safe with me.

My phone keeps ringing,
She's beeping me , but she can't get a hold of me.
Not because I don't hear, but I know I can't answer with this kind of company.
I'm not gonna lie, it's one of those nights that I'm not too proud to share.
I never thought it would be me, barking up the wrong tree but I am.

What would she do, if she knew what was really going on.
She would probably seal the deal and I'd be left alone.

She'll never know what im doing and i know how she's a goodfriend.
I don't deserve her,
And i don't wanna hurt her.
But if she knows..
She'll leave.

Imagine if i could, just imagine if i could, i wish i could go back, and undo, start again and did the things way should be ; the right way.

i hate how you play with my feelings.

2010-02-24T04:10:00.000-08:00

i hate hate hate hate how you play with my feelings.

you think its fun ?

ITS NOT.

but you know what, you cold, heartless person?

its alright, its okay.

i WILL get over you,

and im so much better without you.

you won't get inside my head ever again, not now, not ever, not once.

ignorance

2010-02-22T05:40:00.001-08:00

you treat me just like another stranger..

its nice to meet you sire,

i guess i'll go.

ignorance is your new best friend.

forgotten how to breathe.

2010-02-20T00:11:00.000-08:00

Will you ever let me inside
To hear the thoughts you keep trying hide
Im so lost way back here without you
Im gonna have to walk away pretty soon

I dont understand; I dont wanna know
I used to be able to read you so well
I cant even think ; Something has changed
Now Ive forgotten how to breathe

Its not going to be easy to explain
But I couldnt leave without saying goodbye
Its hard on me to stay so calm like this
Theres so much about you that Im gonna miss

Im not living with regret
Cuz i did everything for you
Its not making sense in my head
And i dont know what is true anymore.

-----------------------------------

xx

2010-02-20T00:03:00.000-08:00

do we deserve..

to bear the shame of this world ?

and like the stars,

that burn away..

the miles.

all the things she said.

2010-02-06T02:03:00.000-08:00

All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
All the things she said
All the things.....
This is not enough

I'm in serious, I feel totally lost
If I'm asking for help it's only because
Being with you has opened my eyes
Could I ever believe such a perfect surprise?

I keep asking myself, wondering how
I keep closing my eyes but I can't block you out
Wanna fly to a place where it's just you and me
Nobody else so we can be free(2x)

All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
All the things she said
All the things she..
This is not enough
This is not enough
All the things she said

And I'm all mixed up, feeling cornered and rushed
They say it's my fault but I want her so much
Wanna fly her away where the sun and rain
Come in over my face, wash away all the shame
When they stop and stare - don't worry me
Cause I'm feeling for her what she's feeling for me
I can try to pretend, I can try to forget
But it's driving me mad, going out of my head

All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
All the things she said
All the things she..
This is not enough
This is not enough
All the things she said

Mother looking at me
Tell me what do you see?
Yes, I've lost my mind

Daddy looking at me
Will I ever be free?
Have I crossed the line?

..

moves me

2010-02-03T04:31:00.000-08:00

i can't help my self but think
what you've done for me day or night
it seems that you are always on my mind
and I know when ever I need you near
i always feel that you'll be there right by my side

your love runs deep within my soul, and I can't let go
you'll never leave me, because I know
that you are the one for me

you're the one who moves me
you're the one who sees right through me
You're the one I lean on every night and everyday
you're the one who makes feel a brand new life that's so unreal
When I think of you and I, you do
you're the one who moves me
moves me, oh, you move me, you move me

what I did without your love is a mystery
now I have you, oh I don't, wanna let you down
everyday it feels like a dream come true
and I pray that you will always be around

When I am down and all alone
you are the one who cares
when I am weak, you make me strong
and I know that you'll always be there.
forever and always.

-------------------

we'll be a dream.

2010-02-02T20:56:00.001-08:00

Do you remember the nights we
Stayed up just laughing
Smiling for hours at anything?
Remember the nights we
Drove around crazy in love?

When the lights go out
We'll be safe and sound
We'll take control of the world
Like it's all we have to hold on to
And we'll be a dream

Do you remember the nights we
Made our way dreaming
Hoping of being someone big?
We were so young then
We were too crazy in love

When the lights go out
We'll be safe and sound
We'll take control of the world
Like it's all we have to hold on to
And we'll be a dream.
Just a dream.

youre not who i thought you are.

2010-01-29T06:03:00.000-08:00

You´re the Wrong man for the job.

I Thought that you´re the best part of me,
Baby i guess that we just believe what,
We wanna believe
But I thought,I knew you so well , I couldn't tell
That this was sinking so deep,
I see it now,
Im Breathing now,
Its time for me
To let it go

It was cool when it started but now the flame has gone
You´re the Wrong man for The Job,
My heart is breaking in Pieces,im still moving on,
You´re the wrong man for the job,
I cant belive that i Took me so long to realise,
Finally know what it feels like
I'm starting over but,I wont be afraid
Im sorry to say,
You´re the Wrong man for the job,

Sometimes i Wish i could take back everything,
It be easier to never have known you,
I would save myself so much pain,
Still i cant stop thikin ´bout,
What im doing without,
You on the lonely nights,
But now i know,what i gotta do,
I cant ever change you,
Lettin it go tonight..

Im Looking for somebody to love me,the way i should be loved,
I Need someone to do more for me,then you ever done,
I Love you but you are not the One

---------------------------

heavily broken.

2010-01-29T05:21:00.000-08:00

I'm heavily broken
And I don't know what to do
Can't you see that I'm choking
And I can't even move
When there's nothing left to say
What can you do?
I'm heavily broken
And there's nothing I can do

Feels like I'm drowning
I'm screaming for air
Louder I'm crying
And you don't even care

So what am i supposed to do?

nearly died today.

2010-01-28T05:25:00.000-08:00

I nearly died today.

Thank God for saving me and my friend.

GEEZ.

PEI YI, if you ever jay walk again, im gonna kill you !

do you know how dangerous it is?

and i was so stupid to run after you and chase for the things you dropped on the way.

stupid two dollar note.

we both could have died on the road if we were a fraction of second slower.

lucky i knock you off the side if not the car would have knocked you and me both at the same time.

luckily i have no serious injury.

so embarrasing anw. so many students and TEACHERS.

THANK GOD THANK GOD.

-----------------------------------

you won't and you nvr will.

2010-01-28T05:12:00.001-08:00

you don't understand how much u mean to me.

you won't and you nvr will.

cos i nvr told you about how i feel.

and i would nvr tell you.

i wish you could see whats behind my eyes.

---------------------------------------------

not ready to let go yet.

2010-01-27T04:07:00.000-08:00

im not ready to let you go yet. so dont go.please.

i need more time.

there's still so many things left undone, left unsaid.

please.

don't leave so fast.

-----------------

please, im begging you.

2010-01-26T00:51:00.000-08:00

please.

im begging you.

don't go.

please don't go.

don't leave.

nth will be the same without you.

i'll miss you so bad till i get to see you again.

i won't get to see you again if you go.

i won't get to hug you again.

and i have so many things left unsaid.

there's so little time left.

how can i explain?

just don't go.

please.

im begging you to see that you're all i want for now.

im gonna miss you.

2010-01-23T18:32:00.000-08:00

geez, im gonna miss you.

like really like a lot.

im gonna miss all ur nonsense, stupid laughters, and goofy acts.

): ): ):

-------------------------------------------------------------------

what would you do?

2010-01-22T18:22:00.000-08:00

All my life you've had an opinion
Doin' things for the wrong reasons
Well not today

Don't you know I think for myself
I get out fine without anybody's help
Don't care what you say

I'm breakin' your heart
But I'm breakin' apart
All you do is hold me down
Try to make me someone I don't know
I'm not the girl you'd thought you'd found

What would you do if I told you
You can't control my life
And what would you say
If I left today with no regrets and no goodbye
What would you do if I told you
There is no more you and I
What would you say
If I walked away and left you there to cry

I don't know what's coming over you
Or how we fell apart
I tried so hard but I don't believe in you
You're not the person I thought I knew

What would you do if I told you
You can't control my life
And what would you say
If I left today with no regrets and no goodbye
What would you do if I told you
There is no more you and I
What would you say
If I walked away and left you there to cry

What would you say if I said to you, "Just go ahead and cry."
-----------------------------------------------------------

Singaporeans are mean.

2010-01-22T04:49:00.000-08:00

Singaporeans are heartless , and inconsiderate.

Poor guy ): feel so bad for him.

he was holding a crutch and limping and holding a big bagpack and a trolley and he was singing so that ppl will give him money.plus,there were rubber bands tied tightly around his feet and his slipper.

and NONE of the ppl gave him anything, except for tourists and foreigners.

I mean like, HELLO? do any of the ppl have a heart?

he's like, so poor thing can.

and there u are ppl, being oblivious.

and i got scolded by this stupid old lady for giving ten bucks to that guy.

fuck her can, like that also scold.

she nvr give money still scold me.

wahlao luh.

somemore ask me to spend my money wisely on MYSELF instead of helping others.

and i was sitting at this bench meant for 4 ppl. then me and my mum was sitting on it already.

the she and her 2 friends come and squeeze in.

like what the fuck luh,

so inconsiderate.

not everyone is as "SKINNY" as her and her pathetic friends.

i feel like slapping her face.

bitch.

Halloween.

2010-01-21T22:50:00.000-08:00

I've decided I'm done
Don't care to move on
Not used to losing someone
If I lost fate
Was no choice I made
Except the excuse of no one
Your careful silence can't replace your stupid smiles
Casseroles and handshakes can't restore
Twelve damn months of ours
You stole me

I don't dare to try again
They said time will heal
And time will mend
And on halloween
The last time you left
If I knew you were never coming back
I would've held on to that last day
Instead of 'Here's your keys'
The last thing I'd say would be 'I love you'
Just in case
I'm only myself when I'm with you baby

I'll be with you someday

Take down my mirror
My pictures of costumes
And you
Put aside posters and books and aged fortunes
And all this reminds me of you
With a pat on the back they say 'Honey, it's time to move on'
And sure he can find you a hobby
Now that he's gone
I stole you

I don't dare to try again
They said time will heal
And time will mend
And on halloween
The last time you left
If I knew you were never coming back
I would've held on to that last day
Instead of 'Here's your keys'
The last thing I'd say would be 'I love you'
Just in case
I'm only myself when I'm with you baby

They don't understand
We were like this since the first time we met
We were born holding hands
Give me flowers and cards
I'll smile all they want
If they give me what I want
Give me what I want

I don't dare to try again
They said time will heal
And time will mend
And on halloween
The last time you left
If I knew you were never coming back
I would've held on to that last day
Instead of 'Here's your keys'
The last thing I'd say would be 'I love you'
Just in case
I'm only myself when I'm with you baby

---------------------------------------------

okay day today.

2010-01-20T22:57:00.000-08:00

so i had an okay day today.

what a surprise.

i really don't know what you want from me.

but it seems as though you're hearing things.

dont get strapped to think,

but did i let you slip out of my head ?

am i that obvious?

have i said too much?

do i thinktoo much?

are things showing through already?

i really don't know.

lets just wait for the outcome.
----------------------------------------

the fall/turn it up.

2010-01-20T04:27:00.000-08:00

I know you can't stay
So i won't be waiting
Anticipating for the fall
We had our time baby
so i won't be waiting, Anticipating for the ca-a-all

Baby, it's over
we both know, lets go forward
i love you but in a different way
i love you, forever

now that we've come to the end of our story,
and i know its gunna be hard for me,
might hurt some, might get too much
but i gotta let it be
as the world turns around and we go different places
new things new dreams new faces,
what a shake up, when we break up
but we keep the memories

turn it up turn it up
for the people that say
were moving and we'll be okay
turn it up turn it up
for the people that say
were moving and we'll be okay

maybe? its better, and i want you to be happy,
sometimes people find it so hard just to say goodbye,
it aint easy the more and the more you try,
so they'l be cheating be deciveing,
but not me and my boy

we understand that were friends and it just aint working,
no point in the constant fighting,
so we'l be grown ups
for a minute
and admit were just in it

but i promise,
we will be okay.

-----------------------------

make me wanna die.

2010-01-19T23:15:00.000-08:00

Take me Im alive
Never was a girl with a wicked mind
But everything was better when sun goes down

I had everything
Opportunities for eternity
And I could belong to the night
Your eyes, your eyes
I can see in your eyes
Your eyes
You make me wanna die
Ill never be good enough
You make me wanna die
And everything you love will burn up in the light
Every time I look inside your eyes
Make me wanna die

Taste me, drink my soul
Show me all the things that I shouldnt know
And theres a new moon on the rise

yeah whatever, i just know you make me wanna die.

---------------------------------------------

im fucking pissed today of all days ):

2010-01-19T22:58:00.000-08:00

i was pissed off in class.

fuck everything can.

stupid lame projects,stupid boring talks.

and now at home got stupid singtel bill which is like, i have to pay so much.

i didnt even fucking used internet in my phone then anyhow say i got.

fuck everything luh, everything is screwed.

oh, thnk you HuiHui,Earth and JunWen.

you guys totally make my afternoon :)

next time my treat for lunch kay :)

eat anywhere also can.

HAHA, ILY guys !

oh i saw luanchun too.she was with her friend.

how i wished i went chungcheng instead.

why am i so stupid ?

{: [: (:

2010-01-17T04:48:00.000-08:00

HAHA went to the clinic to get medicine for Kitson.

and the funniest thing happened hahas.

scenario: waiting for medicine with kit and this old lady was beside us.

old lady: [to me] little girl, you are very skinny.

me:[thinking it as a compliment] oh thanks ?

old lady : are you anorexic?

-kitson holds back laughters-

me: um,no, i am not.

old lady : ah. then you smoke?

me: why do i get that everyday? are you trying to tell me that smoking makes ppl skinny?

old lady : oh. then you take drugs?

-kitson smirks-

me: [ ran out of patience] yeah,i fucking take drugs. i take caffeine, ketamine,heroine,ecstasy,benzodiazepine,whatevs pine, all the pines. that is why i am so skinny. u go take drugs u also will be very very skinny.

-kitson sniggers-

-person call us to take medicine-

-the lady in shock-

-takes medicine-

kitson: toodles,aunty.

HAHA i think that lady is so flabbergasted. oh well. haha :)

anti socialising.

2010-01-15T22:57:00.000-08:00

around 8 months to a year ago,

i once thought that my life was like, at least at the right track.

at least even if im not happy with it,

there was a reason in life to move on and stop dwelling.

but what do i feel now?

i felt nothing.

like practically hollowess.

and i get pissed off every fucking day.

yeah,so what if i anti socialise nowadays.

its so not your business what i like to do.

if i dont wanna talk to ppl, then i wont. no need to shove ur hand in my face to tell me ur there.

i,like to be alone.

so stop asking me pathetic questions like ; wanna go out watch movie/shop/stayback after sch.

its purely my choice.

no one did anything to make me wanna feel that way.

im sorry that i adruptly shove everyone out of my face and ignore all of you.

but thats the way i want things to be.

just leave me alone and give me time kay.

------------------------------------------

could've been.

2010-01-15T04:54:00.001-08:00

Do you ever wish that she was me,
Ever close your eyes, and think about what could've been..
Could've been.

I find it hard to Breath,
When I sleep at night you haunt me inside my dreams..
Inside my dreams.

Look at me, In my eyes.
And tell me that you feel nothing inside.
Cause I can't wash you off my skin..
But I can't see you ever again.

Do you ever wish she was me,
Or am I left here missing you not missing me?
Not missing me..

Look at me, In my eyes.
And tell me that you feel nothing inside.
Cause I can't wash you off my skin..
But I can't see you ever again.

So I'll forget I love you,
Don't want you anymore..
I'll keep on lying to myself, cause we could've had it all..
And you should keep pretending that Im only just a friend,
Can you look me in the eyes and say that its worth it in the end?

Look at me, tell me lies,
Tell me that you feel nothing inside.
Cause I can't wash you off my skin..
But I can't see you ever again.

Again..

Do you ever wish that she was me?

everytime you go ):

2010-01-14T05:18:00.000-08:00

A minute faded, the sky looks grayer
It's the way I miss you everytime you go

Why cant you see it's not easy?
What my heart feels like everytime you go

I'm not myself, without you nothing feels the same

Don't say you're going or goodbye
It breaks my heart but I wouldn't show it everytime you go

It's lonely when all I do is miss you
My smile goes away when you go

You understand me
Make me happy
It's sad I know which is everytime you go

I'm not myself without you
Not even for one day

Don't say you're going or goodbye
It breaks my heart but I wouldn't show it everytime you go

When will I see you again?
Don't make me wait too long

Don't say you're leaving or goodbye
It's hard to breathe but I won't show it, everytime you go

Don't say you're leaving
Don't make me cry
I fall apart but you don't know
Everytime you go I really miss you,
Everytime you go.

---------------------------------------

the happy day :)

2010-01-14T05:14:00.000-08:00

SAW JUN WEN, WEIXIAN AND HER FRIEND WITH A NAME SOUND LIKE FELICIA BUT WITH A B YESTERDAY AT MAGIC WOK !:)

so awesome man, must go there more luh !

String was okay yesterday :)

Pei Yi and i chatted non stop hahas :)

so much crap lol.

today i played piano with zann at foyer after science remedial.

okay,thats about it,

HAHA im in a rush.

bb :)

awesome day :)

2010-01-12T04:41:00.000-08:00

i had quite a good day today :)

HAHA lunch was so funny kay ! i spent it with tash, mij, and div. and later part with YT.

the convo drove me insane :D

HAHA ;

scenario : seating in one table with a 50 plus year old lady at the end of the table.

Tashya : so you change your facebook status right ?

Me : Yeah , haha why ?

Tashya : cool. congrats ?

Mi Jin : HAHA what thing you all talking about ?

Tashya : Facebook lah.

Me : about you-know-who with the name starts with C.

Mi Jin : -laughs- HAHAHAHAHA i know a secret about her and her !

Divya : what thing ? tell me ! did she[me] agreed to skinny dipping off the building ?!

Me : NOOOOO ! ew.

Tashya : oh, did your have sex ?

-lady looks up and stare at me then the soup on her spoon fell onto the table-

Mi Jin : Do you have to say so loud !? everyone staring !

Me : NOOO. thats sick, what were you thinking !? TASHYA !

Divya : its not sick,its normal.

-Freaking Mi Jin laughs her head off and discuss with divya all sorts of things they would dare me to do .-

-the stupid lady still staring-

Me : NOOO, dont listen to Mi Jin or divya ! its not true.

tashya : okay. [stares back at phone]

-STUPID LADY QUICKLY SCRAM OUT OF THE RESTAURANT.-

Mi Jin : HAHA ,you scare the person off like crazy. HAHAHA.

Me: WAHLAO, whats that suppose to mean ? Stop your crap luh.

divya : we dare you go scream kinky keikiu in the mid of the road.

-tashya laughs-

Me : NO. you wish. pay me 2 bucks and i'll do that.

divya : split luh !

Me : NO. your two nvr embarrass me enough already uh.

Mi Jin : HAHA that lady ! look at ur face, youre blushing like shit.

Me : thanks a lot for nothing Mijin .

- Mijin laughs. the divya also laugh. then tashya also laugh.-

SO ANW, THANKS A LOT FOR NOTHING KIM MI JIN ! IM GONNA EMBARRASS YOU BACK ONE DAY I PROMISE :D

happy :)

2010-01-11T05:15:00.000-08:00

miracles do happen.

wishing works.

praying is of course a go for.

anyone's life can changed in a second.

all you have to do is do the thing your instinct ask you to and nvr doubt it.

thank God for showing me and telling me :) amen !

my life changed in the second the words came out of my mouth.

the first 3 words were already half the success.

life is unpredictable but awesome at times.

its how you adjust to it only.

i finally understood !

yay,cheers for me :D

best friends forvever :)

2010-01-10T22:52:00.000-08:00

Tears you try so hard to hide

You hold it all inside

Pretend it doesn't matter

Why keep it yourself

When you got someone else

You know can make it better?

You try to be so strong

But I always know when something's wrong

See when you're feeling down

Hey, wasn't it you

Who's always been there for me?

Don't forget what we've been through together

Hey, isn't it true?

We promised to always be

Best friends forever, yeah

Words you don't need to say

The sad that's on your face

Isn't hard to see through

I've been there once or twice

It's you that made things right

My turn to be there for you

You try to be so strong

But I always know when something's wrong

See when you're feeling down

Hey, wasn't it you

Who's always been there for me?

Don't forget what we've been through together

Hey, isn't it true?

We promised to always be

Best friends forever

When the rain comes down

I'll be there

I will always be around

Just wanna be the one to catch you

When you fall

Hey, wasn't it you

Who's always been there for me?

Don't forget what we've been through together

Hey, isn't it true?

We promised to always be

Best friends forever.

forever and ever and ever. :)

TO MY SPECIAL SOMEBODY ;
ILY and THANKYOU THANKYOU THANKYOU for being there forever and ever.
:)
forever and always,i'll do the return of all your favors.

im gonna be fucking lazy for the rest of the week.

2010-01-10T05:34:00.000-08:00

i hate cramps.

they really suck.

cramps = im gonna be lazy for the rest of the week

= no need pay attention in class

=no need do homework

= no need eat breakfast or lunch

= lazy to get out of bed to go anywhere

=ditching string practices

= ditching remedials

= ditching lifegroup

= ditching church

= being in a bad mood

= one week being wasted.

anw i went to library with bern today again.

she bought me 3 waffles to eat --

chocolate,cheese and peanut. my faves :)

thnk you bern ! ILY

but next time buy one can already.

if not i get too fat i'll blame you.

i gained 1.5 kg over one year ):

not yet.

2010-01-08T06:04:00.000-08:00

Don't walk away

cos the hurt wont fade

I won't dream of the night we met

i won't need your touch

i won't miss your love

and your games is something i will forget

i will be over you someday

but not yet

not today at least.

seriouslyyy.

2010-01-08T02:20:00.001-08:00

sometimes i just cant help but hate you !

you are so fucking imploding my mind.

school really sucks at times.

2010-01-06T23:01:00.000-08:00

school really sucks.

i had had a bad day today. :/

i feel all so weird.

tired,frustrated,silenced.

not to add,homework is wearing me out like shit.

i cant take it anymore.

i feel like i'm a million miles away,

from myself ,

so many open roads,

but they never lead me home,

and i dont know who i am now.

and i will nvr be who i was before.

but i dont wanna be torn.

...

heart shattered. world shattered.

you will lose what you value most..

it wasnt her life. it wasnt even my life.

"what you value most..."

it was my soul.

first week of sch :)

2010-01-06T03:58:00.000-08:00

the upper first week of sch is generally okayy.

i ve got nothing else to update about anw.

so bbye.

-BJ I WANT MY WATCH BACKKKKK !-

:) :) :)

2010-01-02T23:41:00.000-08:00

I CANT LIVE WITHOUT MY LG CHOCOLATE !

feels nice,yet strange and stranded.

2010-01-01T18:50:00.000-08:00

strange.

its strange that i can connect to you to a level though i dont know you well.

you caught me by surprise,i cant deny.

this is kind of weird.

why do i seem like i know you for a long time though i only knew you back a while ago?

LG Chocolate, I love you.

2010-01-01T02:49:00.000-08:00

LG Chocolate..

I love you so much.

Thank you,thank you,thank you for existing !

2010.

2009-12-31T19:48:00.000-08:00

new year,new things.

whos in for more trouble ?

i hate new years.

2010 is gonna suck big time.

trust me on that.

never.

2009-12-29T19:17:00.000-08:00

i know that i should get on with my life,

but a life lived without you could never be right.

i'll never get over you getting over me.

yet.

cause I remember every word that you said,

it all keeps on spinning around in my head,

but it don't matter what I try to do,

i keep on forgetting to forget about you,

and I don't wanna think about you so much,

and everytime I pass by your apartment,

i get this overwhelming urge to walk in and see your face,

and to be in that place, all over again,

the way you smile,the way you laugh..

i never thought that i would miss all the things i used to complain about you,

the football games, hometown friends, i was glad to see it end,

but tell me why i feel so alone without you.

i just can't get enough of you,

but i'm in a rush,

i got to fly away,

plane's waiting up for me right at gate twenty-three,

there's a doorway to my dreams,

i could go or i could stay,

should I change my life or miss my flight?

what happened to forever when we were together ?

stupid of me.

2009-12-27T05:28:00.000-08:00

i just realised how i'll never get to hold you like i did before the storm.

and that i can never look straight into your eyes.

you leave me speechless.

and i hate you for that.

why do you have that effect on me?

it hurts to even hear your name.

and it kills me to see your face.

what can i do to just erase you from my mind?

it seems like even the memory of you is haunting me now.

i thought i could resist you.

i thought that i was strong.

somehow you were different from what i've known.

i didn't see you coming.

you took me by surprise and ,

when everything fell apart, you took a piece of me with you.

and now everything that i do reminds me of you.

im done pretending with the truth.

i know what i want now.

and im sorry i had hurt you.

...

if only time was mine.

i'd know what is the right thing to do.

-smiling-

2009-12-27T04:41:00.000-08:00

went to Bedok Library today with Bern again :)

HAHA i nearly broke my vegetarian rule ):

then we saw this huge huge white carebear with a silver heart.

it was so cute kayy !

anw i wasted money on some stupid icecream. that tasted like oil. breeewww.

LOL

i've got nth else to say.

byebye :)

I Won't Apologise.

2009-12-26T17:07:00.001-08:00

I'm sorry for changing.

I'm sorry it had to be this way.

Believe me, it's easier just to pretend.

But, I won't apologize for who I am.

): ):

2009-12-24T05:32:00.000-08:00

i accidentally deleted my colorful posts.

HAHA.

geez,idk why i feel like im missing my aunt's crapping. haha kinda sad,she's gone for two days already !

LOL christmas eve is kinda awesome today !

just came back :/

misha was wearing super high killer heels :]

i bought my mum presents,
she should be glad.

playing with colors :)

2009-12-18T02:13:00.000-08:00

lala

im in a good mood today hahas

im expecting a good chrismas week :)

and to spend christmas eve with some cute ppl :)

can't wait ! HAHA

i sound so kiddo

LOL

my daddy bought me books for christmas :) thank you :) ILY

cant wait for sch term to start too

its time to play it out !

stronger.

2009-12-17T01:20:00.000-08:00

im taking back what you took from me.

Only Hope.

2009-12-16T00:07:00.000-08:00

You are my only,one and only,hope.

-sighs-

I've missed you !

Terribly.

ke$ha is cute :)

2009-12-14T16:19:00.000-08:00

ahh.

i just realised how i didn't spend my holidays wisely.

i ditched church,i ditched caregroup,i ditched outings and i ditched mostly everything that involves me going out.

and i didnt study too much.

just a wee bit...?

HAHA , Ian ! Have fun in London , don't forget my souvenir :) totally love the awesome souvenirs there man !

went out with the moe co campers yesterday ;)

Haha , sorry for the blur pic ,HAHAS . (: tzeyong is missing ):

oh,i went to BJ's house afterwards. then ktw was also there.

started to play with the water hose. and i ended up fucking drenched.

haha then they childishly put water into balloons and start throwing at each other.

and obviously i am one of the targets ):

haha,i guessed i had fun yesterday.

and today,its back to a normal boring tuesday.

The Last Song

2009-12-13T00:14:00.000-08:00

i wanna watch the last song :)
its awesome.
-sighs-

LMAO

2009-12-11T19:22:00.000-08:00

haha went to BJ's house yesterday :)
then i forgotten to return weixian's text ; haha im sorry );
ah ktw went to mix heneiken and slurpee and ribena together.
it looked gross.
talk about disgusting.

haha the heineken tasted off after i drank tiger beer so i ended up only drinking half of it );
what a waste.
mm.. i went to the library with bernadette for 45 mins and borrowed the two books i want badly.
-sighs- theres too many good books in the library !

haha joke of the year :
BJ : -winkwink-
(:

:/

2009-12-07T01:05:00.000-08:00

im tired of missing you.

im very tired of missing you.

everything reminds me of you.

i don't want to be reminded.

i don't.

i don't.

im supposed to forget.

and to hate you is even better.

-------

2009-12-03T01:07:00.000-08:00

After 12, not so well
Won't pretend, it's too soon to tell
What's round this bend?
No disgrace, about face
Anything not to have to chase you down again
You know nothing hurts like loosing
When you know it's really gone
Except for the pain of choosing
To hold too long

I tried it your way
But I got nothing to show
It's been the same, same
And the story's getting old
So I guess the driveway
Will be the end of the road
For us it's too late
Let the credits start to roll

A lot to say
But not today
Let the radio break the silence
As we drive
A kiss goodbye
Not this time
Don't remember what about this song
I ever liked
You know nothing hurts like loosing
When you know I'm already gone
Except for the pain of choosing
To hold too long

I thought maybe we were getting somewhere
But we're still nowhere at all
I watched your tail lights fading
I try but it still won't fall
I remember what it feels like to know love
And have it taken away
Can't think of what I've learned right now
But I'll be thanking you someday.

(: (:

2009-11-29T16:47:00.000-08:00

i really dont give a shit about it anymore
so fucking stop clinging on it.

let go,let go,let go.

(:

christmas carol is freakyy !

2009-11-25T18:23:00.001-08:00

christmas carol is a freaky movie
that completely have my face behind my hands
GEEZ
i thought it was some cute adventure story by disney
but fuck it was kinda a horror movie with ghost and spirits and stuffs?

WEIXIANNNN !!
haha next time we must go out again ! (:
but dont watch movies like christmas carol kays [...]
that old man was in my bloody dreams man 0_o

HAHA !

yesterday,i went out with weixian to vivo then to bugis !
it was cool,
other than the fact that i was sick,
and not allowed to eat any fried,sweet or junk food.
so i bitterly watched weixian eat her kfc chicken.
):
-sniffs-

then we went around to shop and weixian bought a wallet.
yup,then we ran into junwen's mum and sister.
well,thats about it ?

bbye !

i miss,i love and i dont speak to you anymore.

2009-11-22T20:46:00.001-08:00

i forgot.
i forgot.
i fucking forgot everything.
i erased everything that is a past of you and me.

forgotten.

2009-11-18T00:07:00.001-08:00

after one day,
i already forgotten how you sound like.

i forgotten how the smile on your face makes me happy.

i forgot how you turn my world around with one single smile.

i forgotten if the hand you lent me to hold was hot or cold.

i forgotten if you were all i thought about at night.

i forgotten if you were the reason i cried.

i forgotten if you even was reality or just my dream.

you are nowhere existing near me,

its almost as if you are invisble to me.

why... ?

damn.

2009-11-16T16:21:00.000-08:00

my whole day just got screwed last night.
fuck it,
i waited all night for the 3 words and the moment the words were let out,i broke down.
fuck,fuck,fuck.

anw,my comp is down.
dont bother contacting me via mail or msn or fb or what.

nothing good has happened yet

2009-11-14T17:56:00.000-08:00

Let me in from the rain,
don't you let me go again,
let the water run down my face.

so they say, so they say
i'm gonna take this, i'm gonna take this to the top,
i'll kiss the air
don't waste your breath and just fade away

well ok, i guess nothing good has happened yet,
and well i'll pray, that i'll be alright.

you are so cold,
(i'm so alone)
i'm about to fold,
(just let me go)

wow,im really 'sorry'.

2009-11-14T03:52:00.001-08:00

oopsie,im so sorry,was it supposed to hurt?(:
you are so yesterday.

the getaway

2009-11-13T01:15:00.000-08:00

Here I am again
Talkin' to myself
Sittin' at a red light.
Both hands on the wheel
How am I supposed to feel?
So much runnin' through my mind.
First you wanna be free
Now you say you need me
Givin' mixed signals and signs.
It's so hard to let you in.
Thinkin' you might slam the brakes again.

Put the pedal down
Put the pedal down
Heading out of town
Gotta make a getaway
The traffic in my brain's
Driving me insane
This is more than I can take
You tell me that you love me first
Then throw your heart into reverse
I gotta get away

I can't keep coming back to you
Every time you're in the mood
To whisper something sweet in my ear
It's so hard to move on
Cause every time I think you're gone
You show up in my rearview mirror

Is this just a detour?
Cause I gotta be sure
That you really mean what you say
It's so hard to let you in
Thinking you might slam the brakes again

go away,i dont want you in my life.

my mum.oh wow.

2009-11-13T00:57:00.000-08:00

my mum is a total bitch.
she screws up my life,
destroys my relationships with the closest ppl in my family.

also,not to exclude,all she does is do things in her way.
fucked up much?
i should take everyones suggestion in running away.

oh and anything that doesnt go well for her is MY fault.
awesome much?
and she took away all my freedom cos she thinks that my results are that fucking bad.
well,too bad for her,im not gonna go study like shit for some stupid sec 2 exam or act like a goodytwoshoes and let her threaten me with my freedom.

threaten,threaten and threaten.
all she knows is threaten.
does she ever that actually cared that what i want is clearly not what she wants?

i hate her.

my holidays sucks because of her.
tpc sucked big time beacuse of her.
my life sucks because of her.

all because of her.
one person.

so not fucking worth it to waste time even being near her.

i,fucking hate msn.

2009-11-11T21:27:00.000-08:00

my msn is driving me nuts.
sign in and out every 15 sec,so fucking annoying.

UGH,UGH,UGH ! -pulls hair-

oh and then now my mum is like scolding me.
so bitch luh,everything also scold.
everything also like my fault like that.
i swear im not gonna care about her anymore,let her bitch all she want.

AARGHHHHH.
im super pissed now.dont wanna post already.
WASTE OF TIME.

fucking msn on my last nerves

2009-11-10T00:16:00.000-08:00

ugh msn's such a bitch kay
i hate it,hate it,HATE IT !

always dunno what happen then suddenly offline.
geez,its fucking irritating.
-screams and pull hair-

okay,my so called "good" mood is now totally ruined.
thanks a lot,stupid windows live messenger.
im gonna go use google or yahoo.
UGH whatevs !

okay.chill.im exercising some emotions control already.
theres no need to exhibit my feelings around.
exhibit a,exhibit b to exhibit z is all closed down.
chill.chill.chill.

facebook sucks.
i just got my feelings cheated.
say can activate dunno what dislike button.
ended up dun have.
fucktarded much ?

im practically swearing everywhere.
why am i in such a baddie mood?
i ought to be smiling man.
-.-
-sniffs-

hahah i cheered up a bit at last!

2009-11-09T18:14:00.000-08:00

thank you,kristen,sarah,rachell [!]
you made my day today and you made me laugh haha !
playing reversi with rachell now (:

haha kristen introduced me to many songs ! its awesome; love tears dont fall haha !the guitars are amazing!

okay this part is a must dedicate to sarah as promised 9:
okay,sarah,i love you for saving my butt and chatting with me on comp(:
haha wtf scaty kids scaring kids! so cute haha [:

love ya peeps (: thanks for tagging back at my post ! i love you all alot haha.

the hardest part of goodbye.

2009-11-09T15:18:00.000-08:00

gah,im gonna go crazy alreadyyy.
im gonna miss everyone from tkgs,esp 1e8 ): and for miss ng,im missing her already!
-sigh-
sorry sorry uh. i didnt have a choice.

miss ng ! i love and love and love and love you ! you're one of the most awesome teacher i have ever had and i'm missing you so much already ! you totally rock (: and your mep lessons are uh-mazing ! must keep-in-touch kays !

sha,thanks for being a wonderful "mummy" ! you hear me out so much and you've always been there to listen me out (: i love you ): forever and always.

nurul,thanks for being one of the nicest ppl ive ever met though i know when it comes to serious matters,im always joking around and never that serious,haha! you also help me when i face probs and always cheer me up when i crawl under a table ! HAHA love you a lot !

jessie ! i love you ! thanks for "playing" games with me when im bored like shit during lesson. haha you're my amazing sister in christ (: thanks for all the bible talks uh! and the emo talks also luh haha !

jiayin (: thanks so much for the laughters i've got in class ! you are so funny ! HAHA (: love ya,babe ! thanks for the teachings from the bible too (: youre a wonderful "teacher",you're so patient with me though you know im never the type to concentrate.

sherying ! haha,you're the girl who've been through napfa with me (: thanks for all the support !
and you are the naughty girl who spammed my inbox with cool chain msgs[cant believe im saying it] haha ! i love you !

sam !!!! i love you for youre the person on my speeddial to call whenever i got news ! you and i could talk on the phone for hours about the same thing and we nvr get tired of it ! youre an awesome listener man (: love and love you forever kays !

racheltan (: you always have been there to cheer me up ! still rmb how you comfort me when im all down and how you force me to eat knowing i refuse to? thank you so much,i love you so much.(: youre one cool girl eh !

elizabeth ! haha i might not know you that well but i think youre quite a goodytwoshoes eh !haha youre one cool person to talk to in between times! continue get straight as kay ! love you (:

sarahhh ! haha i enjoyed sharing music with you on the piano (: its been quite fun ! haha and thanks for all the convos when im bored and drawings of me and you in the reflection log ! its really cuteee ! love ya (:

stella ! haha youre my primary school friend ! thanks for helping me concentrate in projects and let me truely learn to be a better good girl in class though im still such a pain to the teachers i know. (: thank you and i love you !

rachell ng (: youre one of the friends i have ups and downs with.but through it all,we still manage to pull it through to the last day of sch and work together (: youre also my msg entertainer and thank you so much for "entertaining" kays! love you (:

divyaaa ! youre the one who introduced me to many things ive nvr experience before. thank you so much for the sundays uh ! macs and macs and more macs please ! love you (:

nadiah (: haha you can be so annoying kays haha but sitting beside you,i get use to you already luh haha jkjk kays ! thanks for sharing history knowledge with me on the phone uh (: love you !

zuyyin ! youre the girl i spent time in library with! love you a lot (: go get a drink smt yeah? (:
i love you haha though we always compete in english !

natasha(: haha youre one nice girl to hang out with! rmb how we help miss aliah to do girlguides thing? it was totally fun haha i drove miss aliah nuts man! love you(: go play tennis smt together with soph kays !

nicole (: you are one awesome girl i know ! haha you always lend me money when i overspend and you always tell me things that get me crazy with (: love you ! so glad i know you kays.

jillian ! youre really cool to talk to when i sit beside you during exam period. i know im quite naughty,sorry luh ! your maths is good haha and i think youre a cool sailor man ! love you (: you crazy twilight fan.

theodora ! HELLOOOOO !! tom felton ! tom felton ! haha,thanks for the jokes and debates uh !love you ! (: youre one hot sailor [oops] ! lol !

pei yi ! youre my awesome string batchie and i love you so much ! youre the person who hears me out after a long day of sch ! i love and love you !! (: thank you so much for everything ~ !

melissaloh ! youre my amazing "daughter" (: youre so cute hahas and i envy your handwriting so much ! love ya babe !

vanessa! haha youre totally one nice girl (: haha thanks for all the cheerups and areyouokay haha i love ya dear "daughter" (;

yauting (: hello,i've missed you ! though youre really annoying at times,i still love you a lot ! haha youre quite fun to hang out with ! im glad that ive met you (: youre quite amazing to tease with ! i like how you make a fuss about things and stomp into classroom (: its kinda cute haha ! still rmb how you call me 30 times a day that saturday in april? haha it was so cool,i think you broke the record of ppl calling me a day man ! and the water fights and poning classes together and videoworld days! i love ya and lets stay friends forvever kay (: thanks for all the times together,i sincerely cherish it. and lets not drive our mums too mad anymore kays haha !

maria ! hihihihihi ! youre my cool lab partner and cool comp partner (: youre quite cute haha when you say "no" (: haha im happy too have met you uh and youre quite fun to hang out with. miss the water fights already ? haha it was cool to get wild together ! love you (: and bye ! oh and thanks for finishing up the mep sibelius thing while i kinda slacked and when around screwing comps...haha !

kimmijin !! haha youre one of my most fav ppl in the world cos youre so cute ! haha i enjoyed my times with you so much and thanks for msg me so late at night and make me sleepy -.- haha ! youre my awesome friend whom i have fun playing with in mep ! haha we went through quite some ups and downs and some cool moments with miss ng[its okay to be sickminded :p] hahaha ! i love ya babe ! gonna miss you quite a lot uh (: haha rmb how i accidentally put paint on your pinafold and you sprayed me water? (: haha,we had fun bitching around eh daddy octopus ! gonna miss all your nonsense man haha !

zann lim aka daddy paper ! i love you most (: haha ! thanks for everything ! thanks for being my this year's top 1e8spammer in my inbox (: and thanks for the "doing together" things ! water fight,counsellor talk,poning class,driving mdm seah crazy,playing piano together before and after school,lunches at bubbleteashop,vidworld icecreams,paint on hands,and eng compos !and thanks for sharing me with your life [haha !] and let me share mine in return. [aw lets not be that tolerable with our mum and be bias towards our dad ! kidding luh (:]thanks for the staybacks we have together too,it was some good quality time (: i love you really like a lot ! thank you so much for everything,babe. you rock (:

anabellll ! youre my awesome sister eh ! i love you so much ! thnks for all the fun times and heart to heart talks and beach fun and walking for 12 kms -.- haha ! i love you a lot ! really like a lot ! youre almost my own sister ! love ya babe !

anw,1e8 thanks for everything ! i wont be who i am without you guys. love you guys a lot (: thank you for an amazing year ! i guess we grew up... hahas !

still waiting hopelessly.

2009-11-09T00:24:00.000-08:00

i'm like obessed with you.
i can't believe it.
you're so cute ♥
[i cant believe im saying this.]

my heart is far too weak to run the miles with you ];
and its too broken to hold your weigh.

the day i know you,i cant believe my luck.
you make me laugh at the silliest things,
and smile at every greeting you send.

now,my world simply revolves around you.
-sigh-
i feel like..im addicted to you.
ahhhhh.

why is this the way things work.. ?

2009-11-08T17:14:00.000-08:00

i stared at your picture all night long.

its like 6.58am right now.

2009-11-08T14:59:00.000-08:00

damn,i specially wake up using the comp,wishing she was online. ):
but she isnt online.
so saddened.

_________________

the truth is im done pretending that im okay when everything is not okay to me.
but if i can sort of move forward to the future,it meant im finally letting go.
if i can say "i dont need you like i used to",i might not totally mean it but at least i've tried and actually said something that maybe in years that i wouldnt get the guts to say.
so if i have actually tried to move on,i think you shouldnt waste your time like that and so should you let go and move on okay.
that'll make me and you happier at least,or that is what i hope,better.
we need to throw the past away in a bottle and start new one.

to sum up

2009-11-08T01:16:00.000-08:00

okay,my holidays sucks,no need to exaggerate so much on that part.
talking to MK on facebook(: shes awesome !

I LOVE YOUUU !!~~

thanks for adding me to chat to the others.(:anw,its so early in the morning in us,why are you staying up so late?GO SLEEP !

im boreddddd.
okay,nth else to say.
bb.

Father by Thy hand.

2009-11-07T17:03:00.000-08:00

Take me Father by Thy hand,
And lead me to that fair land,
Where joy shall not pass away.

From danger keep me free,
And our Comfortable be,
Lest i stray from the narrow way.

So journeying on and on,
You are all i lean upon,
For God He never shall fail,

Take me Father by Thy Hand,
And lead me to that fair land,
That waits just beyond the vale.

back from trekking (:

2009-11-07T06:25:00.001-08:00

i just came back from trekking at alexandra arch,hahaha.
it was terrible.
my leg is sore and i wanna die already.

(:msged yanjie hahas,thanks for cheering me up a bit uh,you quite cute heh.

okay,i shall post tmrw morning kay cos i wanna go get some sleep.
im sleepy for once already D:

hello !

2009-11-06T19:01:00.000-08:00

im finally blogging after so looo-ong !
it feels so good to blog and open up after all the shit and crap.
holidays are seeming so long and boring D:
im grounded.
ughhh ~

anw,happy holidays everyone (:
love ya all !

why is it always like that?when i need you,you're not there for me.im gonna have to stop believing in smt thats not gonna change.leave me alone.get out of my mind.i dont need you.im gonna set myself free from you.

Acting out.

2009-09-16T04:24:00.000-07:00

I don't care what it takes.
I don't care how much medications i've got to take,as long as it will kill the pain.

I can't take the lies you consume me with every breath I take.
And you have no idea completely how much I wanna believe the truth in your eyes.
But this is not happening.

It is used to be the reason I breathe.
But now,it's choking ME.

Maybe if my heart stops beating,
It won't hurt this much.

I will not forget what you've done for me,don't worry.
Never shed a tear,Never shamed.

You are not sorry.

FUCK FUCK FUCK. HAPPY?

2009-09-16T03:00:00.000-07:00

Fuck all those that is happening now.
I don't deserve this.

my mum is kinda cool for once.

2009-09-13T23:39:00.000-07:00

my mum doesnt object me to poning school [: yay.
that's the first time i like what my mum says.

oh,i poned chinese and english lesson. then that mdm khoo bring me to office to "knit" my belt and clip up my fringe --.--

hahaha,i wanted to pon art too but i was busy doing origami with divya,chatting with mijin and writing pranknotes with melissa.

oh and i met that vp 5 times today --.-- hahahahahah! was so random,talking to her everytime i see her.

nothing to say liao..

omg,i love destinee and alexandria for adding me on facebookkkk!

There's no need,seriously,

2009-09-13T03:00:00.000-07:00

There's no point actually,you know.

You ask me why I'm ignoring you.

So sorry to tell you,I've not been ignoring you.

In a bad mood to not talk doesnt mean i ignore you. 2 different things okayy.

I don't know whats the problem with us,seriously.

If we've decided to move on to the future,stop clinging onto the past.

The past is the past,and its long gone.

So why bother taking up whats with the past to the present and stress on it and make everyone so miserable.

GO.GET.A.LIFE.SERIOUSLY.

You are so childish and immatured.

No wonder everyone is running away from you one,by,one.

Don't tell me what i say is hurting you.

I'm just being plain frank with you.

Seriously,i mean it well.

2009-09-12T01:10:00.000-07:00

I,totally have tried to mean what i said before on the same subject.
But i fucking seriously can't with you distracting me like that.
it.is.not.fucking.fair.

(:(:

2009-09-11T03:02:00.000-07:00

String was super cool today[:

I bought my maths along to string to do.

Ended up,my seniors helped me do. So embarrasing. half way playing the violin,saw my paper going around the ensemble D; HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.

Adlina thinks I'm hopeless with Maths.

Well,a big big big thankyou to rachael[?],rachel tan,adlina,genevieve,zihan,vanessa,tessa,yijun for helping out with my stupid maths. <3

LOL.

Gonna meet up with Jas to watch movie in about an hour?

Yay.

;D

i've missed so many ppl D;

2009-09-10T20:27:00.001-07:00

Aw. I missed all my primary school bffs! D;

I looked so retarded,nvm.

Top,me,xuejin then bottom left,janice,yiyin in the middle and then sharon.

aw.what happened to Jasmine?:O

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

OhGah,what happened to yingyi,jiale they all also?D;

Gosh.I missed everyone so mu-ch!

dun wahree,jas,i still love you! [:

okay,got string in about one and one quaters hours. bb.

damn the hw.

2009-09-10T16:46:00.000-07:00

damn the hw.
I havent even done my comprehension or summary yet.
In fact,i don't even know where i put it.
forget it luh,book then book lor!
not like will die like that.

omg so freaking pissed.
my msn is hanging my whole computer cos it has VIRUSES.
what the hell ! --.--

okayy,i should go finish the damn hw.
i got nothing to post.
bb.

<3 Dido [;

2009-09-09T23:34:00.000-07:00

I <3 Dido! LOL.

Wahlao,i ended up anyhow doing all my hw,including the damn compo man.

and there's smt wrong with my stupid comp.

stupid mouse lagged like shit.

Nothing that special to write. Byebye.

there's gonna be heartaches
there's gonna be mistakes in life
there's gonna be happy days
things will go your way in life
things will get better overtime

i never knew how one heartbreak could feel
cause the first heartbreak is so unreal
there's a lesson learned in everything
you will get stronger through growing pains
things will get better in life
we need to understand and know sometimes

but Where have all the angels gone?
I've been listenin' for them,
when will they come around?
I see darkness everyday but with some help from abovethings are gonna change they neverstay the same

Angles, can you hear me callin'?
Angels, can you stop the rain from fallin'?
I know that you're watching, watching over me
In Angels I, I believe

There've been things I can't explain
like how my prayers get answered almost instantly
What about all of those times, I've been followin' them
They lead me through me life,
they guide me towards the light

omg.what shit am i writing.
ugh.

Yesterday[!]

2009-09-08T17:47:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was uber uber uber uber funnnn!

Went out last minute with Sam at Bishan.
I kept getting lost and san called me a dumb dumb.
Then we saw Charmaine and this girl from our higher chinese class.
Then cus i've never been to Bishan before,I was completely confused about everything there.
And i ended up such an idiot that Charmaine said, i dunno you i dunno you hahahaahahah!

And I ended up spending a lot of money.
What the --.--
I bought a small green carebear,its superb cute!!
Then i bought a huge blue one for nurul[:
Sam named my carebear dido after that stupid green dragon from icarly.well,she's got inspiration from novia. whatthehell.
i bought a bdae present for ____. huge domo.

anw,i'm hugging my darling dido now. its super super super cuteee. <3

that reminds me.i had a nightmare yesterday consisting of that bitch and pandas. bbrrreewww. pandas sucks,they're yhew yhew yhew.

so lucky today i've got no cca,can slack at home and use comp XD

ugh i'm super tired sia.
wanna go back to sleep liao.
buhbye.

oh now i rmb,i talked to jiayin yesterday and she asked me which continent los angeles was in.
i said north america.
jiayin's sister said south america.
my mum said west america.
whatthehell.
jiayin was like,ur mum very funny u know.
so embarassing.
yes,los angeles is in the west side of america but we're doing continent now rightttt!!
heck luh.

oh,met nurul this morning to pass her the bear.
so funny,
she passed me a book.

LOL.